


Exchange

by stoicscripter



Category: Invader Zim
Genre: Gen, ZADE
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-16
Updated: 2016-02-16
Packaged: 2018-05-21 00:13:25
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 426
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6031045
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/stoicscripter/pseuds/stoicscripter
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It had become skool policy that no one be left out on Valentine’s day. As such children were given a Valentine’s partner they had to exchange meat with and, because the universe hated him, Zim was partnered with his large-headed enemy.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Exchange

**Author's Note:**

> A little Valentine's blurb because I'm still working on the next chapter of Conquest.

It had become skool policy that no one be left out on Valentine’s day. As such children were given a Valentine’s partner they had to exchange meat with and, because the universe hated him, Zim was partnered with his large-headed enemy.

They’d glared across the classroom with hatred as their names were called; Zim tried to think of how he could sabotage the meat he would set before Dib. Explosives, poison, brain-eating parasites the possibilities were endless.

The possibilities, unfortunately, required that Dib ingest the meat which he almost certainly wouldn’t do. In the end he came up with the perfect plan that would require nothing more than a lie.

On Valentines day, with a red heart-shaped box in hand Zim marched up to Dib’s desk. He set it down on the surface and stared hard at his enemy, “Happy Meat Day, Stink-beast.”

Dib slid his own box onto the surface of his desk before he casually flipped the lid open to his gift. It was just a regular old slab of meat. Dib raised an eyebrow at the normalcy of the interior and Zim took his cue. He leaned in with a wide too innocent grin, “It’s human.” He said in a whisper before turning away with the box Dib had given him.

He could hear Dib sputter and shove the box away but he ignored that in favor of seeing what diabolical thing Dib had given him. He set the box down at his own desk and opened the top…

They were chocolates, just ordinary plain old chocolates in a heart shaped box with a little note taped to the box top. Zim ripped it off and read it.

_You’re a jerk and I hate you, but in the spirit of Valentine’s Day I’ve decided not to slap you with meat and burn your face off. -Dib_

Zim blinked as he read the words over again. Interesting… Valentine’s Day had a curious effect on the Dib if it would make him weak enough not to take an opportunity in their war. Zim picked up one of the chocolates and observed it carefully before he put it in his mouth. It was sweet, it was delicious it was… BURNING!

Zim screeched as Dib laughed at him from the other side of the room. Trickery! There was meat hidden in the chocolate! Oh that horrible smelly beast! Zim coughed and tried to scrape the meat off his tongue as he glared at Dib. Oh… He would get back at that ugly beast! There was always tomorrow.


End file.
